EarShatter

JACK: You know what she needs? A nice warm bowl of Kabbalah.

WILL: It’s not a… [SIGHS] I’ll boil the water.

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I eavesdrop a lot. Oftentimes in the office, I hear people mumbling and talking to each other and I get a lot of free and classified information about them and our other officemates. Before, I thought it was wrong to listen to other people’s conversations, but I really wasn’t doing anything extra but just keeping to myself, slaving away with my work. Which boils down to two things: they talk really loudly as if they’re miles apart with no cellphones to use, or my ears are too big for a person of my built. I thought it was a curse. Now I know it’s a gift.

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Knowing truly classified office information can be both exciting and dangerous at the same time. The thrill of exclusivity kicks in as I know that I’m one of the people who know very powerful information. Better yet, I am the only person whom they think knows nothing about something but really does. So this gives me a blanket of protection if I decide to utilize this information to my advantage. The fucking dork doesn’t know anything…he’s innocent. Reconnaissance. I should be in the CIA.

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I don’t have a poker face. You can tell easily if I don’t like you. For the rest, I put on a happy face. In every new interpersonal experience that I encounter, I always give the other person the benefit of the doubt, although I know that sooner or later, one or both of us are going to fuck up the set up.

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Dogs don’t purr. They bark. So before barking at someone, make sure you don’t sound like a cat now…more so later. Waging a war with someone requires the necessary skills of indifference, confidence and tolerance. Luckily for me, I have plenty of the early two and still improving on the last one. I don’t really tolerate enemies. As a teenager back then, I really engage people into a heated verbal or sometimes physical fight when agitated. As I grow older however, God farted and I caught a wisp of his wisdom, and I thank Him for the patience. So I resorted into cold wars. I tell you, it’s better here.

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I believe in karma. I believe that all of us are made up of energy that’s being transferred from one living being to another. I dunno if it coincides with the concept of karma, but I imagine people doing bad things to others, are transferring negative energies. And as they give out this bad energy, nothing will be left of them -just an empty soul. Like the law of conservation of energy, it can neither be created nor destroyed. So, it will only circle around, transforming its nature but sooner or later it will go back to its original state and will be transferred to the one who’s given it off in the first place, this time double in amount.

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When you say “sorry” to someone, make sure you surrender all your pride, but not your contention and beliefs. This word is the most humbling expression that I know and I have used it so many times. We often say “sorry” for the trivial things that happen in our lives, like bumping to another person in a busy street, yet it is so hard to say for the bigger reasons.